This week I have read about a man who apparently had everything he ever wanted in life. Found, in his home shot to death by his own hand. I guess the two questions above are pressing on everyone’s mind.

Is there an answer?
How do we deal with this?
What is next?

The questions simply go on.

I find myself at a wild sort of strange place as these questions blaze across the world that this man touched.

After 15 years of working as an EMT/Paramedic in NYC, and seeing multiple folks who have committed suicide. And then the three years of working help to prevent teenage suicides. I find myself feeling love-less, alone, and like no one left in this life simply cares about who I am. As a person, as a man.

But in all this I can’t seem to find the reason to stand before a mirror, hold my gun to my hand, and pull the trigger. Where is the line in the sand for these folks. With all the hundreds of people on anti-depressants today. And the millions that will be encouraged to go on them.

do we really know, when they get to this point.

I find it really interesting that as we as a Nation change, and get ourselves further and further away from the basic Bible, and it’s teachings. We find more and more folks willing to pull the trigger.

Well I may be love-less, alone, and depressed here. But I know that something greater awaits me way up there somewhere. That trigger can stay where it sits.

I hope you find that love there, and not at the end of that trigger.

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About Medicsmurf

I am an ex- NY City Emergency Paramedic. Life brings us new challenges, adventures, and downfalls. I look to making them all a positive way to grow. From here we only go up.

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